Sensei’s Weekly Mokuso November 15th-22nd
You may have noticed recently we have been pushing really hard with the repetition of basics, and while basics are the foundation of anyone’s physical karate training, their repetition does something far more powerful for our children.
Repetition of basics help develop in your child an attitude of hard work, perseverance and grit. This attitude ultimately leads to discipline, however, they also build something extremely valuable in our children.....MENTAL TOUGHNESS or RESILIENCE.
You may have also noticed there are specific words and phrases we use repeatedly both online and at the dojo. By the time your child earns their black belt with us they will have repeated the phrases “TRY MY BEST!” or I NEVER GIVE UP or I NEVER DO EASY!! hundreds, if not thousands of times. This is not by accident.
While it may not seem like a big deal on the surface, one thing we have discovered is the “words” your child uses are powerful and life changing. The story we are constantly repeating will become what, and who we are. It will become our identity.
One of the most powerful lessons we can teach our children is how they talk about themselves has a lot to do with what they become! The best part......We can consciously decide what our personal story will be, and we are in full control of our destiny.
The first step to ensuring we are aligning our identity properly….NOTICE ……We must be constantly vigilant in the words we choose and what we saying. First just become acutely aware of the words you and your child are using. Just focus a little more, and you might be amazed at what you hear. This will give you a very good indication of how they think, and what they think of.
While you are at it, try to notice how you say it. Most of the time we find a young child will mirror much of what their parents say. Remember we, the parents, are the number 1 educators in our child’s lives. They are constantly watching and copying what we do!
The second step…..DECIDE……Once you are aware of the words you and your child use, just make a simple decision: “Are the words and how we talk inline with the identity we wish for ourselves?
Are they a proper reflection of who we want to be?” or “Do we need to change the words we use and how we talk about ourselves and the world/people around us a little?”
For instance, does the phrase “I can’t” come up often.....does the focus tend to be more on why something can’t be done or, is it more of an “I can do anything!!!!!”
Pay particular attention to how they talk about school. Is it positive and looking forward to going to school? The phrase you simply cannot let a child say ever is “I hate school!” But you cant just suggest they don’t say it, the phrase must be replaced with a different one that employs an opposite mindset like: “I love school” or “I love learning!”
Here is a big one. How many of us know someone or have heard your child criticizing, complaining or blaming? Blaming is a big one because you give up control. You give your success or failure to someone or something else. If your child says “Well, I just don’t like the teachers!” or “I don’t like my teammates!” later it just turns into “I hate my boss!” and “I don’t like my co-workers!”
They will start getting in the habit of finding a way to blame someone else for not succeeding and saying “It was not my fault!”
The last step is to ACT….. Consciously choose your words to suit your identity. Catch yourself every time when you are being self defeating or using phrases and words not conducive to your, or your child’s success.
So......What's shaping your child's identity???
Have an Amazing Week!!
And your Keiko TEAM
Keiko Karate – “Actually we do make Ninjas and Superheroes here………………we turn kids into Ninjas and we turn their parents